What the Hell?
by MyLittleJewMonster
Summary: Immortals have always been mysterious creatures to the little devil known as Damien, all from culture to comedy - to their extreme ignorance to reality. Hopefully staying around his test subjects will help him improve his knowledge on these weird creatures. Hopefully. [may contain ships later in the story]


**Chapter one/prologue:** The research begins

* * *

Damien´s POV

"Hmm… no, not like that…..but… maybe like this…."

The young man tilted his head. Eyes calmly scanning the wall in front of him. Clicking his tongue lightly.

"But, if I possibly move it over here…. and connect that with that…. " Elegantly moving his hands, Damien picked up and moved the threads to connect to other nails. Once eventually stepping back, a soft breath left him. Silencing himself for a moment.

"I give up…. I don't know what's so funny about this "pepe" guy… is it like a frog? A badly drawn one for sure. Is that funny at all? It´s a meme but…. what´s a meme? A selfish person? But why is a selfish person f-"

"Damien Sweetie, you shouldn't stay in your room all day." The little devil was interrupted once Satan spoke up. Peeking in through the door, or well, rather standing half-way stuck in said door with his horn. The couple holes indicating it wasn't the first time it´d happen.

"Why not go outside? Torturing sinners with the other demons?"

"I´m busy father." Damien grumped back, staring thoughtfully at his project. "I´m trying to solve this case."

"A case?" The older demon hummed, walking over to him. Once spending a few moments looking the well decorated wall over, he looked back to his son.

"...Exactly what case are you talking about?"

"Humor. Comedy. I don't get why mortals make that weird noise called 'laugher'. It sounds hideous. According to the articles I´ve read, it´s a reaction to happiness - but what is happiness?" The black haired boy mumbled, tapping lightly with his foot as he thought.

Silence filled the room for a short amount of time, apart from the agonizing screams and cries from outside the house. It was indeed Hell.

"Well…" Satan coughed a bit, rubbing the back of his neck. "It´s… not easy to explain that, dear. It´s - a human thing. We demons don't have time to worry about things like that." He smiled sadly, gently ruffling his hair, receiving a scoff from the other.

"We're immortals dad, we got all the time in the world." Damien grumped back.

Lucifer paused before chuckling.

"That´s it! That´s the weird noise! You're making it too!" Aggressively pointing his finger at him, he seemed completely furious, to say at least - he sneered. "Father - what are you hiding from me!?"

"Damien…." The old devil frowned, sitting down on the bed. " It´s… hard to explain. It´s, well - I would say it's something I've copied the mortals. I have no need for laugher, or well, I didn´t." He smiled a bit. "Times have changed, son. I weren´t the hot headed little devil I were centuries back. It comes with the age."

 _Dad seems pretty content with his explanation, if you could call it that. It sure as hell didn't help me any further - if not at doesn´t understand… I don't just want to /do/ the things - I want to understand them…._

"I´m leaving." Damien stated, quite suddenly. Snapping his fingers to get a fully packed suitcase to appear.

 _Always best to be prepared_

"What? What do you mean by leave?" Lucifer instantly got up, feet stomping onto the ground in the process.

"I'll head back to earth. I have research to do." He bluntly stated.

"And what if I say that´s not going to happen?" Satan growled low.

Damien didn't reply to that, staring calmly at the man. Satan happily joined the staring contest, and the room was once again filled with dead silence.

For how long this so called "staring contest" lasted?

Maybe a few minutes? Years? Who knew.

Time in Hell were a thing for itself.

"Fine." Lucifer eventually gave up, letting out a breath. "Just leave - but be back before it´s been a decade! Oh! - And use the knitted sweater I made for you!-"

"Yes father! It's packed!" Damien were already halfway out the door, hurrying to find a place to teleport.

Not like he had to, but it were indeed a great excuse to take a stroll through Hell one last time.


End file.
